Recognition

I HAVE REALISED A LOT

This weekend I went back to where I grew up and to say I recognised how much my life has changed is an understatement. I saw family and friends, got drunk when I really shouldn't of, reminisced on funny memories but the most eye opening thing I did this whole weekend was talk about.... me. 

Obviously going back to where I moved away from people are going to ask me a lot of questions like 'How's living in cambridge?' 'how is the job going?' 'Who are your fit friends and are they single' and after having to answer these questions at least five different times I noticed all that I have achieved in the space of one year. It's crazy when you look back on twelve months because so much can happen and it's not really a long period of time. A lot of people have congratulated me on my job with a follow up question of 'what exactly do you do as a visual merchandiser' and a lot of people have asked either why I was with my ex boyfriend, how it ended or if I miss him/ the relationship at all. Obviously one conversation was easier than the other but I am an open person so I told them and moved swiftly on to ask what they had for dinner last night...

 I think for me recognising what I have achieved is a massive flaw of mine because I am always looking at what I haven't achieved. I'm a very driven person and I also want the next step but sometimes I need to sit back and look at what I've done and what I'm doing and so with people asking me what I've been up to since I moved I have had the chance to reflect and pat myself on the back a little bit. I've made mistakes, I've had people give up on me and I've had really crappy situations happen but I've made the bestest friends, I'm working my way up the career ladder and getting somewhere with that and most importantly I have lost people who never deserved me anyway. 

I came back to my 'home town' and I found out nasty and untrue rumours were being spread about me even though I had been gone a year and at first I was angry and maybe tweeted when I shouldn't of but then I realised if they are still talking about me then they clearly still care.... Imma just sit back with my tea on this one. But seriously I learnt that no matter what people are saying about me the people who truly know me have stuck up, stood by me and would not believe a single thing and that's why it is all worth it. My friend told me and immediately said 'don't worry Soph I didn't listen' and that was exactly why I was eating a kokoro with him and not them. 

What I'm trying to say is that no matter what stage of the year you are in, whether everything has gone downhill or whether everything is at it's peak, reflect on the last twelve months and note all that you have been through, whether you got a new job, a new friend, found love, got your heartbroken or still in the 'trying to find someone ANYONE PLS' stage of your life, was all worth it because it's all setting you up for the next twelve months and you can look back and thank the girl who spread the untrue rumours, the boy who you fell in love with, the family members you created the happiest of memories with and the friends who accepted you and believed in you because that's what life is all about. 

Recognising what you have achieved is one of the hardest things to do but don't let the fear of striking out keep you from playing the game. You're doing great. 

Soph x